tardiscalledsexy:

My math teacher called me average.

How mean.

(via lindsaylohoean)

snorlaxatives:

me: *eats cookie dough*

some weak ass person: “you’ll get salmonella poisoning!!!” 

image

(via zackisontumblr)

charlie-carmichael:

              Love the booty   

          Grab the booty

         Hold the booty 

      Desire the booty

    Fight for the booty

                 Bite the booty

                         Touch the booty

                                  Care for the booty                                

                                       Worship the booty

                                         Squeeze the booty

                                        Believe in the booty

                                      Embrace the booty

                                   Respect the booty

                            Protect the booty

                        Spank the booty

                           Hug the booty                

(via cvnada)

(Source: illestcunts, via cvnada)

familyfriendlyurl:

when u take a cookie without askin mama

image

(via catholiccrackaddict)

lauriejuspeczyk:

im lAUGHING SO HARD BECAUSE LOOK AT HOW HARD MARIO IS TRYING TO STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT IN THE BACK

Is no one going to mention how strongly daisy is putting out the vibe?

(Source: suppermariobroth, via fabercrombieandbitch)

808dilly:

Me as a dad hahaha

(Source: weloveshortvideos.com, via punkmonksteven)